It is with great sorrow that I end my day today. I have interviews with two prominent companies tomorrow as well as an exam in my most essential class. Yet today, I could not focus on any of the preparation. I did not give God my best. I did not prepare my fields for his rain. I failed God.
I am not sorrowful because I do not think I will do well on these three things tomorrow. I actually think I’ll do just fine. But my heart is so heavy right now; keeping my head up seems like a chore. I just want to sleep and call it a night. And try again tomorrow. And maybe God will accept my humble offering. The little that I give him tomorrow. But hopefully that little I give tomorrow is more than the little I gave today.
"There are tears from the saints
For the lost and unsaved.
We’re crying for them come back home.
We’re crying for them come back home."
I read a book in middle school called Slake’s Limbo. It wasn’t that great of a book, but one concept of it really stands out to me because I like observing interpersonal interactions. Slake is a homeless boy who collects discarded newspapers, and sells them to earn a living. Some of his customers become regulars, some people are one-time customers. His conversations with these people are either personal and deep, or brief and surface level. It varies.
Each person lives in his/her own bubble. People come into that bubble and become part of that bubble, that microcosm, that world. Some stay for a long time before leaving, some enter and leave immediately, but very few stay forever, especially for Slake.
It is a dark and lonely world for Slake. The way I imagine it is, the more and more people enter Slake’s bubble, the more colorful and vivid his world becomes, but as people begin to leave, the picture loses color and turns to black and white.
I don’t think I’m lonely. Maybe at some point in my life, I will be but now I am fine. However, I admit there is a certain aspect of life that only other people can bring. And I also think that one of the saddest things in life is people entering your bubble and leaving. A recent death of someone I look up to as well as a series of unfortunate events for another friend got me thinking about this again. I want these things back, but those ships have sailed. Those doors have closed. These beloved are now out of my sphere.
But Lord, where You send me, I will go. I will not put my hand on the plow and look back. I will not go bury the dead…
First Large Group of the year was yesterday. Gordon introduced a concept that I am familiar with, but until then, wasn’t pieced together quite as perfectly. We’ve all heard that Christ died in our place.
But what if the concept went full circle?
Our sin and wickedness runs deep through our veins. All that gets transferred to Christ, on the cross. Imagine a big arrow going from us to the cross. Then Christ, who was the only person in history to be sinless, has his righteousness transferred to us. Imagine a big arrow from the cross to us.
Thus we end up with ye olde switcheroo.
"A sinful man can marry a sinful woman and the whole world, including the Lord himself, will rejoice."